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Make Your Home a Safe Haven

A song writer once said, “where you are loved is where you belong”

There is a “home” feeling that everyone craves for regardless of your background or socio-economic status and as we go through the challenges of everyday life in various settings, we all want to go back to a place of safety, comfort, peace and above all, love. This desire is quite common to everyone; husbands or fathers, wives or mothers as well as children equally desire to always go back to a place of rest whenever they talk about going home and it is much more than just the comfort or beautification of the house or availability of shelter, food, gadgets or luxury. It is in the presence of love, harmony, peace, togetherness and more. However, this may not always be the experience for everyone. Although everyone  seem to have their own unique picture of the perfect home, the common factors include, a sense of belongingness, feeling of love, a place to feel secure, a place to be yourself and to feel wanted regardless of your shortcomings, this place is called home.

As a matter of fact, there is absolutely no perfect home or perfect family. You simply make the most of what you’ve got! It can be quite disturbing how people tend to focus on and invest more on the things that don’t really matter so much when it comes to building the home while neglecting the most important ones of making the home a safe haven for the entire family wherein everyone can feel loved and wanted. Furthermore, parents, in a bid to instill discipline and success in their children, may often end up using certain approaches that can result in emotionally pushing the children far away from them although they may be in close physical proximity within the home. This can lead to defiant behaviours on the part of the children and a distorted perception of what the home should be. Such children may be found to hate going home and would rather be interested in some other friend’s home or just going away.

In all of these, we all have our parts to play in making our home a place to be desired. The following tips will be helpful,

  • Love your family unconditionally
  • Be helpful to one another
  • Be there for one another
  • Support one another
  • Spend time together
  • Do things together
  • Go places together
  • Have respect for one another
  • Don’t talk down on any family member
  • Be approachable
  • Be willing to improve and make things better
  • Trust your family and be trustworthy
  • Improve communication, let everyone be allowed to talk and bring up issues that may arise and possibly cause misunderstandings
  • Let everyone contribute in their own little way
  • Dialogue with the children, discuss with them before making major decisions, allow them makes their choice on matters that directly concern them
  • Be mindful of one another

When building your home, paint the walls with unconditional love because it is good to surround yourself with love. Beautify your home with peace and rest. Nurture your family members with trust and togetherness. Furnish your home with forgiveness. Fill your home with laughter, joy and contentment. Hang cherished memories as pictures on the wall and make room for imperfections and improvements. Above all, enjoy your home and let it be sweet too.

Remember to follow me on twitter @DrMorayoJimoh for more interesting updates on #Family

 

 

 

 


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Take a Stand!

family-therapy-headerThe foundation of our society is built on the bedrock of the family. We all are products of a family regardless of the size and although we may not all be totally pleased with the type of family we come from, it is of no doubt that our families play an integral role in much of what we are right now. This is because most of our strongly held values, beliefs, thought patterns and behaviour are largely influenced by our family.

“Charity they say begins at home” if this is true, it also means that the opposite holds. Hence:

“Dysfunctional homes breeds a dysfunctional society”

Of a truth most of the problems plaguing our society today can be traced back to our homes. It is therefore only logical to see that the solutions to these problems can be sourced from the home front. The family is a microcosm of the larger society which makes it a kind of preparatory school for us to learn the values and ways of life before going out into the world to find our path. These homemade lessons go a long way in determining who we become and our contributions to the society at large. Truly, the importance of families cannot be over emphasized!

But then, if we really pay close attention to the current societal norms, we will realize that the rate at which families are falling apart is quite alarming. Even those that are holding up are doing so on a very thin line that could snap at any moment.

Won’t our societies become totally helpless if this age old heritage goes extinct?

What can we do to preserve our families?

One way to sustain this integral part of our human experience called ‘family’ is through “friendship”. Being friends with our family members will enable us communicate better and help us value one another more.  We all have roles to play here, parents be friends with your children, children be friends with your parents, siblings, cousins, aunties, uncles and grand parents also. When we let ourselves fall in love with our family and appreciate them for who they are and what they mean to us, we are sending positive messages which will reflect back on us thereby making the love go all around.

We get back what we send to the universe and as much as we keep pelting our families with stones of ingratitude,

we are unconsciously reinforcing those behaviours that caused

the problems in the first place!

Rather, we should learn to make excuses for our families… and be willing to give them another chance not a second chance but ANOTHER chance.

No one is perfect, but we can try to get better each time. So our priority should be on helping each other be the best we can be.

The quality of your life can be measured by the impact you make on the lives of others and your home affords you a better opportunity to reach out and touch the lives of people who are really so dear to you.

family-meeting-300x198The greatest possessions we truly have are our family but painfully, we really don’t appreciate them well enough until they are no more. Then we start dwelling on memories…

Don’t let that be your story, express gratitude and re-establish those ties that bind you to your roots.

We need to re-open closed down communication lines and find ways to settle old rifts by forgiving past mistakes and giving chances for reconciliation.

We are family not just because we share the same blood line or name but because we share a heritage that money can’t buy!

Nothing in this world can replace the love, support, care, strength and drive that a healthy family relationship builds in us.

To do better, we need to stand for each other!

The future depends on us, our society needs a change, the human race must continue, our families must be saved!

Do the needful while you still can and take your family to greater heights. Sow new seeds of friendship and you can be assured that you will enjoy all the benefits.

primarycareIt really doesn’t matter how bad things are right now, just start today, make a change today, give your home your best, take a stand and see our world become a better place for us and coming generations.

Follow me on twitter @DrMorayoJimoh for more captivating updates on #TakeAStand!


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Strengthening Family Relationships during the Holidays

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During this time of the year, many families are engaged in various activities like going on trips, reunions, parties, meetings and so on with the aim of reconnecting and reinforcing family ties.  The December holiday season also provides an opportunity for estranged family members to restore their relationships and settle all forms of acrimony that may exist amongst them.

“Well, what better time is there to strengthen your most important relationships than during the holidays?”

While some may have it easy when it comes to reconnecting with their family members, on the contrary, there are some others who really want to reconnect as well but they may find it difficult to do so and this might make them tend towards depression, anxiety and all other forms of negative feelings at such a time when they should be having fun!

However the current strength of your family relationship, the following are keys to help restore and further strengthen your family ties during this holiday season.

1. Effective Communication    78631212_XS (1)

Communication is one of the most vital aspects of nurturing any relationship and it goes beyond mere verbal expression. Keep in mind that when communicating, your facial expressions, gestures, tone of voice and other forms of body language can speak more volume than what you may intend especially when it comes to family relationships. The tricky part is that you may be unaware of your non-verbal communication towards your family as a result of familiarity or otherwise. During this holiday, make a commitment to be more conscious and courteous about your non-verbal communication with your family in order to boost the effectiveness of your communication.

2. Quality Time  family-dinner-1

To many families, having free time to spend together seems to be a luxury as we are often too busy with work, school and other engagements all year round. The holiday season is a great opportunity to reconnect and strengthen family relationships. When planning the holiday, ensure to include special “family time” to do things together as a team such as planning a party together, playing games, having a picnic or going on a trip.

3. Giving  

Like the old saying goes, charity begins at home. It literally begins at home! This is a season to show love and the best expression of love is through giving. It requires some level of selflessness on your part. Giving is inexhaustible as there is always something to give, it could be gifts, money, advice, support and even giving your time to listen or to share a special moment will all go a long way in strengthening your family relationship.

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Meeting a need in a family member’s life during this holiday will create a sense of being thought of as important and will in turn strengthen your relationship. Remember to communicate effectively, spend quality time and give during this season! To gain more tips on strengthening family ties click Here.

For more juicy info about #strengtheningfamilyrelationsships kindly follow me on twitter @DrMorayoJimoh.

 


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Family Ties

“Family is the most important thing in the world.”Princess Diana

 familyThey have watched you laugh, cry, win or fail at different points in your life. They have seen you at your worst and best, they have shared in your joy and pain. They know and understand your strengths and weaknesses and they may seem to criticize you the most. You didn’t choose them and you can’t forget them in a hurry but out of all the people in this world, they are the ones that probably know, understand and accept you the most – Your family! Yes, your father, mother, sister, brother, spouse, children and significant others. They are the ones who will be with you in times of crises, celebration, mourning and even at death.

“Rejoice with your family in the beautiful land of life!”- Albert Einstein

 Every family is different, what applies to one family may not apply to another. It’s the uniqueness of your family that makes it special. You should cherish your family even with all the imperfections that forms part of it. The obvious truth is that there really is no perfect family no matter how perfect they may seem to the outside people. Every family  has their own challenges as well as strengths. Here’s a tip;

 Take time out to appreciate the positive sides of your family while refusing to mull over the negative aspects of your family. family 1

“When trouble comes, it’s your family that supports you.” – Guy Lafleur

 As humans,we have a  strong need to love and be loved and the family is usually the first platform where love is expressed such as in caring for and sharing with one another. The bond that ties your family together is not just blood, but more of the shared joy, love, memories and respect for each other. It’s the reason why you love your brother, sister or others in your family regardless of how much you have fought with them in the past or their weaknesses.

“A man travels the world over in search of what he needs, and returns home to find it.” –  George Moore

 We have a responsibility to our family to keep it strong and knitted together in love. Doing this requires a daily effort on our part to invest in our family with our time, gifts and other resources.

Family ties are precious threads, no matter where we roam,

 They draw us close to those we love, and pull our hearts toward home.

“Love begins at home and its not how much we do, but how much love we put into that action”.- Mother Teresa

Welcome to the month of February, the season of love.loveEvery day this month… (and of course other months), make a conscious effort to put a smile on a family member’s face!

Love starts with you.