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YOUR MENTAL HEALTH STATUS: POSITIVE OR NEGATIVE?

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Your mental health is more important than the meeting, the test/examination, the interview, the dinner, the grocery shopping, the family dinner, people’s opinion, your relationship status, etc. Be conscious of your mental health and take care of yourself.

Are you aware that your mental health is just as essential as your physical health? Do you know that caring for the mind is as important and crucial as caring for the body? In fact, one cannot be healthy without the other.

Mental health is simply the psychological state of functioning at a satisfactory level of emotional and behavioral adjustment.

Mental health is how you think, feel, and act in order to face life’s situations. It is how you look at yourself, your life and the people in your life. It is how you evaluate your options and make choices.

Many people have mental health concerns from time to time. These concerns may be as a result of different factors ranging from stress, emotional breakdown, financial troubles, traumatic events, etc. A lot of people are of the idea that mental health issues only affect some certain categories of people, this is not true.

stigma free

Say “No” to stigmatization! Say “No” to discrimination!

Mental health issues can happen to anybody irrespective of your gender, age, financial/societal/religious status, field of work and environment. People with mental health conditions deserve just as much support and compassion as people with physical health conditions.

A person struggling with their mental health may experience mental illness. Mental illness refers to a wide range of mental health conditions — disorders that affect your mood, thinking and behavior. It is important to note that not all these disorders are necessarily obvious at onset, but when your ability to function effectively on a daily basis becomes impaired, then be aware that there is a need to check on your mental health with a professional before it gets worse because it cannot improve on its own. The earlier the check, the better your chances of fast recovery and getting back right on track.

for mental health

Do not be ashamed to step out and get yourself evaluated if you are experiencing any distressing sign and symptom that is impairing your ability to function in any way.

Do not be afraid to discuss your mental health; don’t let it eat you up.

Always remember, you are stronger than the circumstances you are going through!

Make an appointment with a mental health professional today and get to know your mental health status. Be aware! Stay mentally healthy!

For more information, visit our website on http://www.mobilehealthconsult.org and remember to follow @DrMorayoJimoh on twitter.

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DON’T WAIT UNTIL THE LAST MINUTE, DO IT NOW!

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The habit of always putting off an experience until you can afford it, or until the time is right, or until you know how to do it is one of the greatest burglars of joy. Be deliberate, but once you’ve made up your mind – jump in.

– Charles R. Swindoll.

Have you ever sat down to complete an important task — and then suddenly discovered your eyes were fixated on your TV screen watching movies or engrossed in surfing the internet? Or perhaps you suddenly realize that your dog needs to be fed, you need to respond to some chats, your house needs cleaning — or maybe you should go ahead and have lunch, even though it’s only 11 a.m.?

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Next thing you know, it’s the end of the day and your important task remains unfinished.

Everyone puts things off until the last minute sometimes, but when you chronically avoid difficult tasks and deliberately look for distractions, you are procrastinating. You may believe you perform better under pressure, but more often than not that is just a way of you justifying putting things off.

Procrastination is the habit of delaying an important task, usually by focusing on less urgent, more enjoyable, and easier activities instead. It is different from laziness, which is the unwillingness to act.

You may delay but time will not

– Benjamin Franklin

Sometimes, procrastination takes place when you ignore things to be done until the “last minute” before a deadline. Procrastination can take hold on any aspect of life—putting off cleaning the stove, repairing a leaky roof, seeing a doctor or dentist, submitting a job report or academic assignment or breaching a stressful issue with a partner.

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Procrastination usually results in sorrowful regret. Today’s duties put off until tomorrow gives us a double burden to bear; the best way is to do them in their proper time.

– Ida Scott Taylor

Procrastination can restrict your potential and undermine your career. It can also disrupt your teamwork, reduce morale, and even lead to feelings of guilt, inadequacy, self-doubt, depression and job loss. So, it’s crucial to take proactive steps to prevent it.

Looking on the bright side, it is possible to overcome procrastination — with effort.
The first step to overcoming procrastination is to recognize that you’re doing it. Then, identify the reasons behind your behavior and use appropriate strategies to manage and overcome it.

HELPFUL TIPS TO AVOID PROCRASTINATION

1. You have to recognize the fact that you are procrastinating: if you start postponing things you need to do, the tasks before you or you direct your focus unto something else because you want to avoid doing your task, then you are probably procrastinating.

2. Ask yourself, what are the reasons you give: For instance, are you avoiding a particular task because you find it boring or unpleasant? If so, take steps to get it out of the way quickly, so that you can focus on the enjoyable aspects of your job.

3. Make lists of things and chunk them: this will prevent you from ‘conveniently’ forgetting about those unpleasant and overwhelming tasks.

4. Set deadlines and priorities: The priorities will help you to easily identify the activities you should focus on doing and the ones you can ignore. The deadlines will keep you on track in achieving your set goals and will mean that you don’t have time for procrastination!

5. Tackle the hardest tasks at your peak times: Do you work better in the morning or in the afternoon? You need to identify when you achieve your best results in doing things, that is when you are most effective and do the tasks that you find most challenging at these times.

6. Act on it!

 

 

The only difference between success and failure is the ability to take action.

– Alexandre Graham Bell

7. Don’t be a perfectionist: Sometimes you would rather avoid doing a task that you feel you don’t have the skills to do than do it imperfectly. You don’t have to wait until you are certain about the outcome of your task before you start working on it. So what do you do? Something, Anything. As long as you are not just sitting there idle. If you screw it up, start over. Try something else.

8. Reward yourself: Celebrate small victories for having completed your tasks. The reward may be a short water-cooler conversation with a colleague, a stroll to a nearby café for a coffee pick-me-up, or maybe a larger reward such as treating yourself to a movie. Let your brain know that you will reward it for focusing and being attentive.

For more information visit our website www.mobilehealthconsult.org and remember to follow @DrMorayoJimoh on twitter.


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Planning a Memorable Holiday

holiday

Hurray!!! It’s that special time of the year again. The end of the year that is associated with lots of activities and festivities. For some people, it is a time to reunite with family and friends, for some others, it is a time to reflect over the year and review set goals while for another group of people, it is a time to celebrate and be thankful for the year. No doubt, it can also prove to be quite challenging, whereby rather than enjoying the holiday, most of us end up getting stressed and are unable to cope during this season.

What are your plans/expectations for this holiday season?

Could it be to have just a “normal holiday” or a “memorable one”?

You can have a memorable one this year with the following helpful tips:

Tip # 1

Have a good plan

Having a good plan cannot be overemphasized during this holiday season and as the old saying goes “if you fail to plan, you plan to fail” Have a plan for EVERYTHING! (Food, shopping, trips, guests, decorations and other expenses) And remember to keep it REALISTIC too!

Tip # 2

 Stick to your plan!a1stick

Sticking to your plan will require a whole lot of discipline on your part. Stick to your budget and avoid emotional spending.

Tip # 3

Get helpluxury-travel-concierge-services

If you are not too good with planning or sticking to plans, you may benefit from getting help from a trusted friend, family member or trained professionals that can help create a memorable holiday for you.

Tip # 4

Keep your plan visibledownload (1)n

Endeavor to keep copies of your plan in places where it is always visible to you like, your wallet, on your mirror, on the fridge, close the bed, on your door and every other place you are likely to look at several times during the day.

Tip # 5

Be mindfulmindfull-during-the-holidays-and-every-day

Mindfulness is moment to moment awareness of your thoughts, feelings and emotions in a non-judgmental way. It is a powerful tool that can help you throughout this holiday season from planning to achievement of every single item on your list. Take out time for yourself to practice mindfulness during this season and enjoy all the benefits. For more information about mindfulness meditation, kindly visit www.mobilehealthconsult.org

As you make your plans for this holiday season, ensure to have realistic expectations in order to avoid getting disappointed at the end. The above tips are certainly helpful to creating a memorable holiday for you and your loved ones.

Remember to follow me on twitter @drmorayojimoh for more interesting updates on #MemorableHoliday.


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He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not…

“A great marriage is not when the ‘perfect couple’ comes together.

It is when an imperfect couple learns to enjoy their differences.”

-Dave Meurer

ringsMarriage is a sacred institution that signifies the joining of hearts and minds of a man and a woman in a union that is expected to last until death. This institution is most looked forward to by young adults as they desire to share their lives with their “true love”. Let’s pause a bit and look closely at the term “true love”. How true is this love that makes a man do anything to capture the heart of his damsel? Is there such a thing as fake love? What exactly is love in the confines of marriage? How would you define love?

Sometimes, we are confronted with the credibility of our spouse’s profession of love. When two people take vows to cherish and love each other forever, they, at that moment experience a rush of love or feelings that carry them on till a year or so. Research by James Spencer at Brigham Young University (1992) in a longitudinal study measuring marital quality, revealed that universally,  romantic love is experienced in the first year of marriage. After this period, the couple is soon faced with the reality of living with a completely different person from a different background with different interests and preferences. Arguments, conflicts and moments of angry outbursts may be common at this period which may question the veracity of the initial love professed at the time of taking solemn vows.

Does this sound familiar? If you are married I’m sure you can accede to the fact that marriage is not always a bed of roses. There are times of “up” and times of “down”. Times to laugh and cry, fight and make up, criticize and encourage, etc.

Based on a research by Campbell, Weiner-Davis, DeMaria, Harrar et al, Chris Garner proposed 5 stages of marriage which are:

1. The Enchantment phase:

This is otherwise known as the honey moon phase. This phase has been researched to last a year or two depending on when children arrive. It is a passion fueled phase with intense focus on attraction. Couples believe that they will live happily ever after much like the fairy tale stories of Cinderella and snow white. Excitement and euphoria characterize this stage and couples usually share similar interests. They can talk for long hours without getting tired. At this stage, all they want is to be together.

enchantment

2.  The Realization phase:

Feelings of euphoria wear off and couples realize how different they are. It is a time of disenchantment where they realize differences that exist between them. Power tussles, arguments and conflict over minor as well as major issues results. Remember the story of a couple who fought over how to squeeze toothpaste? This kind of scenario often occurs at this stage. Would it be sufficient to state that the love that once existed has gone sour?

realization3. The Acceptance phase:

At this phase, the differences observed are accepted. Each person begins to see the other person and accept him/her without being judgmental; after all it would be difficult to change the other person. Couples at this stage are able to work through the challenges they face.

acceptance

4. The Commitment phase:

Understanding, peace and harmony are characteristic features of this stage. This is a matured stage of a relationship that exists even when problems and conflicts arise. Couples have learnt to understand themselves and work through whatever comes their way through teamwork and cooperation. Each couple knows about the weaknesses of the other but choose to stay or commit themselves to them based on the strengths they have.

5. The Co-creation phase:

Couples who get to this stage look beyond themselves and extend their oneness to others. They are able to work together in unity to bring about impact in the lives of those around them. They are able to contribute their own quota to society by mentoring young ones and giving back in different ways.

With these 5 stages, how would you define love? Is it primarily the passion that comprises the enchantment stage, the intimacy of acceptance phase or the commitment of the commitment stage? The truth is a combination of all 3. This was proposed by Robert Sternberg in his Triarchic theory of love.

So, love basically is a mix of PASSION, INTIMACY and COMMITMENT.

Kindly follow @DrMorayoJimoh for more interesting updates on Love and Relationships.


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Spice Up Your Love! 


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If you were to think about one special person in your life right now, who will that be? My guess is the one you refer to as your; “Honey”, “Sweet heart”, “Darling”, “Love” “Valentine”, “Sweetie” or maybe some other special names you have coined for yourselves probably in your local language or some other foreign language. It’s a wonderful feeling to know that someone holds you special in their heart regardless of your flaws.

Relationships are powerful and therapeutic. Just think about it, having someone to talk to after a hard day’s work, or having someone who cares about you and how every single minute of your day is being spent. What about knowing that there is someone special who can listen to you when others may seem not to pay attention, or even being able to share your deepest thoughts and feelings openly with someone who understands and is willing to make you a better person.

Love makes life beautiful and being in a healthy relationship adds color to your life. Relationships are like plants which require good soil, sunlight, water and some other nutrients to flourish. A farmer knows very well that he has to water his seeds consistently before they begin to blossom and produce a bountiful harvest for him.  Often time, people only get excited at the onset of their relationship (first few dates) but soon experience some form of dryness or “boringness” in the relationship and may even opt for a new one with a different person with the hope that the “excitement” they seek may be restored again. Sadly, this cycle goes on and on.

Relationships require work and time- by way of watering the relationship (Like the farmer waters his seeds) thereby flaming the embers of love.

Here are some powerful ways to spice up your relationship

  1. Communicate more: in relationships, communication is key. You should be able to talk about EVERYTHING! Nothing should be too difficult to talk about and this should be cultivated at the beginning of your relationship.

If you want be my lover, you have to first be my friend!

Talk openly about the things you are not comfortable with in the relationship as well as how both of you can make things better. Talk about the things you love about your partner and also what you love about the relationship. Talk about things that are peculiar to both of you as well as what applies generally.

Endeavour to study the verbal and non-verbal communication of one another.

  1. Play together: when last did you play like a child? My guess is as good as yours. There is a time for everything, a time to work and a time to play!play The beautiful thing about play is that you get to laugh about the silly things that happen and you also get to break the walls that lie between you and your partner. Take on the challenge to play  hide and seek or any other childhood game you remember as often as you can.
  2. Add some adventure to your dates: Going out on a date? picnic dateDo something different each time. Spice your outings with surprises and adventures. If you do more of restaurants and places that require a table for two setting, try going on a picnic for a change. You have to plan properly for this- here is a tip: make a list of all that will be needed for the picnic and divide it into two parts- one will contain things that you will come along with while the other will be a list of what your partner is to come along with. You can also see a movie together at a different cinema, go site seeing or do some other activities that will thrill you and your partner.
  3. Forgive easily: In relationships, unforgiveness is a major issue that can result in building very thick walls between partners. Learn to forgive each other easily. You will always reap the benefits.

In relationships, the first to apologize is the bravest. The first to forgive is the strongest. The first to move forward is the happiest!

  1. Be creative: If you are willing to add more spice to your relationship, then you have to be creative. Do something unexpected for your partner everyday and let it become a part of you. Soon, you’ll notice how much more spicy your relationship will become!Lovesign21

Remember that every good relationship requires effort to be successful. Practice the outlined ideas and share with us your experience and some you have thought of as well.

Kindly follow @drmorayojimoh for more wonderful updates on Love and Relationships.

 


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What’s your love language?

love language 1Love has many definitions. However, to some people the word does not even exist or may be thought of as just a mirage. To some, love is seen as a warm feeling of affection towards others, while to others it may be considered as the butterflies in one’s stomach at the sight of a loved one.  Love may also be thought of as an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person. This last definition reveals love as unconditional; that is a person is loved and showed love regardless of who the person is or what he has.

There are many ways of showing the commitment to love. By caring, speaking kind words, being polite, giving, sharing and other displays of love.  Gary Chapman, a counselor has enumerated 5 ways of showing love, which he termed as love languages. These include:

5-love-languages

#LoveLanguage1- Gifts: However inexpensive or expensive, people whose love language is gift giving engage in it and expect others to do the same. They feel most loved when a person surprises them with a gift every now and then. This is quite different from those who are materialistic that is more focused on what they can get in cash or kind from the other  partner. Such individuals appreciate the thoughtfulness of the giver.gifts

#LoveLanguage2- Acts of Service: “How can I help you?” and “Let me do this for you” are questions that are ever on the lips of those who speak love through kind gestures. They desire to express love by assisting others and feel loved if they are as well.  Simple acts as such as trashing the waste bin, cooking a meal, arranging the living room, washing clothes etc. are simple acts that such individuals prefer.acts-of-service

#LoveLanguage3- Touch: This language refers to sexual or physical intimacy. A person whose primary language is physical touch appreciates and feels loved when they are given hugs, pats on the back, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face. They see these as a show of concern, care, and love.  More often, such people are also quick to communicate such gestures.hugs

#LoveLanguage4- Words of affirmation: Words they say are powerful. People whose love language is words of affirmation thrive on the positive words spoken to them by loved ones. Words that approve of them,  express acceptance and validation are expected. Compliments, constructive words, kind words, words of encouragements are ways of expressing words as a love language. Saying “I love you”, “You are the best”, “You made my day”, “You look awesome” etc., a million times achieves the desired effect and even more each time it is said.

words of affirmation

#LoveLanguage5- Quality time: Are you always complaining that your loved ones and friends don’t visit you? Are you eager to spend time with your family? Then, maybe your love language is quality time. For people whose love language is quality time, there is a craving to spend  secluded time with loved ones. At such times, they expect undivided and complete concentration of their friends or loved ones at that time.

quality time

So which love language do you speak?

One. Two. Three. Four. All

You may speak more than one, but if you look closely, there’s always one primary love  language that you express and expect.  You may also find out the love language of your spouse, loved one or friend and START SPEAKING IT!

Discover your love language by clicking HERE

 Kindly follow us @drmorayojimoh for more tips this love season.. Show some love today and speak the right language!

 


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What’s Love Got To Do With It?

whats loveI’m sure the title may have got you dancing and reminded you of the song by Tina Turner. Have you ever wondered what love has got to do with Valentine? Has it ever crossed your mind? We mention Valentine and associate the word with love. We celebrate the holiday, give gifts, roses, cards, show love and for most of us, we have no clue as to why? Is valentine a person or place? Let’s see what history says. Many stories have been found to represent why we celebrate valentine. Actually, Valentine is the name of a person and record has it that there were three people named Valentine in the history of the Roman Catholic Church.

Story 1
During a period of invasion in Rome, Emperor Claudius put a ban on marriages. He did this, believing that single men made better soldiers. However, a priest named Valentine who believed in love and marriage, secretly married couples. He was found out by the Emperor who eventually beheaded him on February 14th. It was said that he gave up his life for the love of love and the love of God.

Story 2Valentine
Another Valentine is rumored to have been imprisoned from worshipping God as the Emperor at the time commanded everyone to worship 12 Roman Gods. While in prison, the jailer requested that he bring his blind daughter to learn under his tutelage. Valentine agreed and taught about arithmetic, nature and also God. One day, the jailer’s daughter asked whether God could heal her, and valentine said yes. He prayed for her and she was healed. On the eve of his death, he wrote a note to her and urged her to keep close to God and signed “from your valentine”. The next day which was February 14th, he was executed. Some rumored that he fell in love with his captor’s daughter.”
Story 3
It is also believed that the holiday has its roots in the pagan festival of Lupercalia- a fertility festival dedicated to Faunus, Romulus, and Remus, founders of Rome, which held on the 15th of February. In the 5th century, Pope Gelasius declared that February 14th was St. Valentine’s Day and outlawed Lupercalia, calling it un-Christian.

 

love round

Irrespective of which story holds true, Valentine’s Day became associated with the idea of love. It is seen as a day to show love, care and affection. This includes but is not to limited to opposite sex relationships. This day can also be regarded as one to extend a hand of love to the less privileged and show love to family and friends. Someone once said,  “love makes the world go round”. The world can become a better place if we truly love each other. There would be a decline in wars, terrorism and violence.

As Valentine’s day draws near, make up your mind to love and show that you love.

Love yourself,

Love others and

Remember that love has everything to do with it!

love 2

For interesting tips to spice up this love season, follow @drmorayojimoh for updates. If you are following the #LoveDare, kindly make comments or share your experiences with us.