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WHAT IF I FAIL AGAIN?

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Failure is the opportunity to begin again, only more intelligently. – Henry Ford.

Are you scared of taking on a challenge all because you think you might not succeed? Are you holding yourself back from starting that project because you are scared you might fail? Or are you just so afraid of failing that it causes you to be stuck or moving on? Or you hesitate from trying, thinking you are not good enough?

Everyone has experienced failure at one point or another but that doesn’t have to hinder you from trying neither does it have to be the end of it. More often than not, to succeed at times we need to have failed at a point. Failure is a way of learning to think of better ways to achieve our set goals in order to come out with excellent outcomes better than we ever thought.

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Funny it may seem that what a person may categorize as failure may just be an opportunity to learn for another. The thought of failing can be scary, true; but when you are so scared of failing that you allow it stop you from doing something that will bring your progress, hence, causing you to be stuck and hinder you from progressing, you are experiencing what is referred to as ‘Atychiphobia’ – fear of failure.

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A person is said have phobia when he/she has an extreme, unreasonable or irrational fear of something or situations as a result of being exposed to certain situations, objects, places or creatures. A person is said to have ‘Atychiphobia’ if he/she is experiencing persistent, recurrent and irrational fear of failure.

Phobias like ‘Atychiphobia’ can be so extreme that they completely paralyze you, making it difficult to carry on with your tasks at home, school, or work. You may even miss out on important opportunities in your life, both personally and professionally.

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Failure does one of two things: it will either keep you stuck or get you moving!

CAUSES OF ATYCHIPHOBIA

It may be difficult to say what the real cause behind one’s fear of failure is but one is likely to have a fear of failure if:

  1. You have watched other people fail and perhaps not able to recover from it. This is called ‘Observational Learning Experience’.
  2. You heard or read stories about other people’s experience and as a result, you developed fear of failure. This is called ‘Informational Learning Experience’.
  3. You have had personal past experiences of failure that resulted in serious consequences; for example, losing a job.

SYMPTOMS OF ATYCHIPHOBIA

The symptoms range in severity from mildly severe to extremely severe. You may experience some of these symptoms if have a fear of failure:-

  1. You may feel reluctant to explore new things or ideas or take on challenging tasks.
  2. When you have a low self-esteem or lack of confidence in yourself.
  3. Uttering negative statements like ‘I am not good enough to take on that project’.
  4. When you are fond of procrastinating; that is, postponing your set out goals because you too scared of starting.
  5. If you are only willing to try as long as you certain that the outcome will be positive – perfectionism.

Other symptoms may include;

  1. Intense feeling of panic or anxiety.
  2. A serious need to escape a situation that produces the fear.
  3. Feeling detached from yourself.
  4. When you feel you don’t have control over a situation
  5. When you generally feel powerless over your fear.

HOW TO OVERCOME YOUR FEAR OF FAILURE

  • If you are experiencing Atychiphobia, the first step to overcoming it is to believe in yourself that you are good enough and try again.
  • It’s best to seek the help of a professional, a psychotherapist or perhaps a Certified Psychologist for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). This will give you exposure to the tools that you need to overcome your fear of failure.

For more information on the therapy procedures visit our website on www.mobilehealthconsult.org and remember to follow @DrMorayoJimoh on twitter.

 

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Touch a Heart This Holiday

 

“If you want others to be happy, practice compassion. If you want to be happy, practice compassion”- Dalai Lama

Fostering-Character-Development-in-Teens-Compassion-pt-1

Showing kindness not only to family members and friends but also to strangers is a sure way to enjoy your holiday. Sometimes to make the holiday truly memorable, you will need to do something different from what you’ve done in your past holidays.

Love is better expressed when it is directed at those who do not expect it from you.

Showing love to a spouse, sibling, friend or family member is a common act but then how often do we think about those who are not in any way related to us? How often do we show love to those in need? How often do we reach out to the old, the less privileged, the physically/ mentally challenged, the widowed and even those random individuals we see on the streets?

Do you really want to make this holiday worthwhile?

Then make an effort to meet a need in someone’s life this season

To achieve this, here is a very practical 10- Day plan to reach out to others!

DAY 1:

Make Three People Smile Todayimages

Saying a word of affirmation can help you achieve this. Say things like “you are beautiful/ handsome”, “I love your smile” or “that’s a lovely dress/shirt you have on”. You can also achieve this by giving out a small note with a word of encouragement written on it.

DAY 2:

Buy a gift for a strangergifts

This act seems a little weird but it is an amazing way to surprise someone this holiday and spice up your holiday as well.

 

DAY 3:

Give out your good old clothes and other items to someone who needs themfree_clothes

Many of us form the habit of disposing our old stuffs when we no longer need them ignoring the fact that there are some people who cannot afford these items. This season, instead of discarding your good old stuffs, give it to someone who needs it. You’ll be glad you did.

DAY 4:

Help make the environment beautifulParkCareVolunteer_rdax_495x278

Today, take out time to beautify the environment. Resolve not to litter the environment, take an extra step to clean up your surroundings, plant some flowers, decorate the environment etc. You never can tell how much the beauty of the environment would lighten someone’s heart.

DAY 5:

Spend time with an elderly person today!

One Step at a Time

Look out for an elderly person in your environment and spend time with him/her. You can also help out with some house chores like taking out the trash, helping out with laundry, cooking a meal, mowing the lawn or you can even tell them a story.

DAY 6:

Be the reason a Child is happy todayhellping a child

The smile you leave on a child’s face today might just be what you need to make your holiday a memorable one this season. Pause and think! Device a means to make a child happy today and see how that makes you feel.

DAY 7:

Visit the Orphanageaids-orphan-children-africa-6

Visit the orphanage today. You may need to buy some gift items for the orphans if you wish to. You can also decide to engage them in fun stuffs like teaching them new songs, telling them stories, playing games and acting.

DAY 8:

Reach out to the sickmormon-caringforsick

Your encouragement would go a long way in the recovery process of a sick person today. Visit a hospital and give words of encouragement to the sick!

DAY 9:

Show concern for someone who is despondent

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Try to encourage someone who is down. Use both words and actions. Don’t just be sympathetic but as much as possible try to plant hope in the person.

DAY 10:

Be Nice

Be nice to everyone you meet today. Be polite- say please, excuse me, thank you, and I’m sorry as many times as possible. Be quick to forgive those who offend you and also quick to apologize to those you’ve wronged.

For more insightful updates on #TouchaHeartThisHoliday follow me on twitter @drmorayoJimoh