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What’s your love language?

love language 1Love has many definitions. However, to some people the word does not even exist or may be thought of as just a mirage. To some, love is seen as a warm feeling of affection towards others, while to others it may be considered as the butterflies in one’s stomach at the sight of a loved one.  Love may also be thought of as an unconditional commitment to an imperfect person. This last definition reveals love as unconditional; that is a person is loved and showed love regardless of who the person is or what he has.

There are many ways of showing the commitment to love. By caring, speaking kind words, being polite, giving, sharing and other displays of love.  Gary Chapman, a counselor has enumerated 5 ways of showing love, which he termed as love languages. These include:

5-love-languages

#LoveLanguage1- Gifts: However inexpensive or expensive, people whose love language is gift giving engage in it and expect others to do the same. They feel most loved when a person surprises them with a gift every now and then. This is quite different from those who are materialistic that is more focused on what they can get in cash or kind from the other  partner. Such individuals appreciate the thoughtfulness of the giver.gifts

#LoveLanguage2- Acts of Service: “How can I help you?” and “Let me do this for you” are questions that are ever on the lips of those who speak love through kind gestures. They desire to express love by assisting others and feel loved if they are as well.  Simple acts as such as trashing the waste bin, cooking a meal, arranging the living room, washing clothes etc. are simple acts that such individuals prefer.acts-of-service

#LoveLanguage3- Touch: This language refers to sexual or physical intimacy. A person whose primary language is physical touch appreciates and feels loved when they are given hugs, pats on the back, and thoughtful touches on the arm, shoulder, or face. They see these as a show of concern, care, and love.  More often, such people are also quick to communicate such gestures.hugs

#LoveLanguage4- Words of affirmation: Words they say are powerful. People whose love language is words of affirmation thrive on the positive words spoken to them by loved ones. Words that approve of them,  express acceptance and validation are expected. Compliments, constructive words, kind words, words of encouragements are ways of expressing words as a love language. Saying “I love you”, “You are the best”, “You made my day”, “You look awesome” etc., a million times achieves the desired effect and even more each time it is said.

words of affirmation

#LoveLanguage5- Quality time: Are you always complaining that your loved ones and friends don’t visit you? Are you eager to spend time with your family? Then, maybe your love language is quality time. For people whose love language is quality time, there is a craving to spend  secluded time with loved ones. At such times, they expect undivided and complete concentration of their friends or loved ones at that time.

quality time

So which love language do you speak?

One. Two. Three. Four. All

You may speak more than one, but if you look closely, there’s always one primary love  language that you express and expect.  You may also find out the love language of your spouse, loved one or friend and START SPEAKING IT!

Discover your love language by clicking HERE

 Kindly follow us @drmorayojimoh for more tips this love season.. Show some love today and speak the right language!

 


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What’s Love Got To Do With It?

whats loveI’m sure the title may have got you dancing and reminded you of the song by Tina Turner. Have you ever wondered what love has got to do with Valentine? Has it ever crossed your mind? We mention Valentine and associate the word with love. We celebrate the holiday, give gifts, roses, cards, show love and for most of us, we have no clue as to why? Is valentine a person or place? Let’s see what history says. Many stories have been found to represent why we celebrate valentine. Actually, Valentine is the name of a person and record has it that there were three people named Valentine in the history of the Roman Catholic Church.

Story 1
During a period of invasion in Rome, Emperor Claudius put a ban on marriages. He did this, believing that single men made better soldiers. However, a priest named Valentine who believed in love and marriage, secretly married couples. He was found out by the Emperor who eventually beheaded him on February 14th. It was said that he gave up his life for the love of love and the love of God.

Story 2Valentine
Another Valentine is rumored to have been imprisoned from worshipping God as the Emperor at the time commanded everyone to worship 12 Roman Gods. While in prison, the jailer requested that he bring his blind daughter to learn under his tutelage. Valentine agreed and taught about arithmetic, nature and also God. One day, the jailer’s daughter asked whether God could heal her, and valentine said yes. He prayed for her and she was healed. On the eve of his death, he wrote a note to her and urged her to keep close to God and signed “from your valentine”. The next day which was February 14th, he was executed. Some rumored that he fell in love with his captor’s daughter.”
Story 3
It is also believed that the holiday has its roots in the pagan festival of Lupercalia- a fertility festival dedicated to Faunus, Romulus, and Remus, founders of Rome, which held on the 15th of February. In the 5th century, Pope Gelasius declared that February 14th was St. Valentine’s Day and outlawed Lupercalia, calling it un-Christian.

 

love round

Irrespective of which story holds true, Valentine’s Day became associated with the idea of love. It is seen as a day to show love, care and affection. This includes but is not to limited to opposite sex relationships. This day can also be regarded as one to extend a hand of love to the less privileged and show love to family and friends. Someone once said,  “love makes the world go round”. The world can become a better place if we truly love each other. There would be a decline in wars, terrorism and violence.

As Valentine’s day draws near, make up your mind to love and show that you love.

Love yourself,

Love others and

Remember that love has everything to do with it!

love 2

For interesting tips to spice up this love season, follow @drmorayojimoh for updates. If you are following the #LoveDare, kindly make comments or share your experiences with us.


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A mother’s love: Love like no other

mothers loveIt’s February, the month of love, when we celebrate valentine. As in the last article, family is truly where love starts from. A person cannot give what he or she does not have as such, even as family is the first agent of socialization, it is also the first place where a person learns what love means. Right from birth, the attachment a child has with the mother is very crucial in the formation of interpersonal relationships with others in future. There is really nothing like the love between a mother and a new born infant. Such love is revealed in touch, stares, caring, sucking and feeding. While these activities go on, the child may either learn to trust or mistrust the care giver. Babies of responsive mothers develop trust while babies of unresponsive mothers may develop mistrust.

This may seem like a whole lot of psychology, but research shows that attachment in childhood influences personality and interpersonal relationships in adulthood. Just like a newborn infant seeks attention, we older “babies” are no different. Love thrives on attention. The amount of time you spend with your loved one be it your friend, spouse or family member determines the quality of such a relationship.

The best inheritance a parent can give to his children is a few minutes of their time each day– M. Grundlermothers love 2

Extending love to the younger generation contributes a lot to our own fulfillment as adults. Extending your attention, care, love, time and resources to your child or another leaves a lasting impact on that life which may culminate into eventual success.

The mother-child love is so strong that it comes with a lot of benefits. An enormous amount of literature and research have highlighted some of the following as benefits of a secure and strong bonding between a mother and a child.. You would love this:

  • Children grow up to become sociable with good interpersonal skills and less aggressive behaviors.
  • Strong bond determines whether a child develops a stable romantic relationship later in life.
  • Exposure to less stress occurring as a result of consistent responses to your child’s cries and frustrations optimizes brain development. On the other hand, high levels of stress may result in irreversible brain damage.
  • Children with a securely attached parenting are able to control their emotions.
  • They have a positive self-concept and high self esteem.
  • As adults, they are able to make positive assumptions about others as such they have better relationships.
  • When relating with others, they engage in more helping behaviors such as showing gratitude, appreciation, care, comfort, and volunteering.mom-kisses-child1

The above mentioned can only be made possible through a responsive parenting and bond between a caregiver and a child. The reverse is usually the case when parents are absent, negligent or abusive.

One way you can be more responsive to your child’s needs is by monitoring your child’s progress.

As the cell is to the body, so is the family to the society. You can learn more tips on parenting by following @drmorayojimoh on twitter.

 

 


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Understanding Dyslexia: Strengths and positive skills

HiResWith the previous article dwelling on the signs and causes of dyslexia, it is important to note that a formal psycho-educational assessment is required to ascertain if a person has dyslexia. This assessment is aimed at examining memory, language, orientation in time and space, behaviour, motor skills, intellectual ability, bodily awareness, information processing, psycho-linguistic processing, and academic skills of the child. It determines whether or not the child is reading, writing or spelling at age appropriate level. Such assessments also take into account the child’s birth history, developmental milestones and overall school performance. It is conducted by trained specialists such as educational psychologists.

Strengths and positive skills of individuals with dyslexia

Although children with dyslexia have average or above average intelligence, they may experience difficulties learning language based subjects since language is the most common mode of communicating new knowledge in schools. People or children with dyslexia can learn to read and be proficient in language skills when their strengths are maximized. They have inherent strengths that if used can make them perform at levels at par with their contemporaries.

Below are some positive strengths of individuals with dyslexiaStrengths

  • They are great at visuo-spatial thinking.
  • Fast problem solvers who are able to think laterally
  • They are intuitive and good at reading people
  • They are verbally articulate and may be  great communicators
  • Creativity is a major strength possessed by them – so many people with dyslexia excel as designers, artists, actors and more
  • They are excellent at solving puzzles
  • They are spatially talented- many individuals with dyslexia are employed as engineers, architects, designers, artists, mathematicians, physicists, physicians, dentists and some other professions.
  • Individuals with dyslexia frequently enjoy above average physical co-ordination skills
  • they possess great emotional strengths such as empathy
  • They are inclined to think outside the box most of the times.
  • They are persistent individuals.

strengths 1

 

In order to maximize these strengths, brain based strategies are necessary to be utilized when teaching individuals with dyslexia and this will be the focus of the next article.

Always remember that individuals with dyslexia have strengths and learn differently!

Follow @DrMorayoJimoh for more updates. You can contact us for a consultation on dyslexia by clicking HERE

We would love to hear from you at Mobile Health Consult!

 

 

 


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Understanding Dyslexia: Myths and Truths

Are you a parent? A teacher? A school administrator? A special education needs coordinator or consultant? Are you just a lover of children? Do you know anyone who has a child with learning difficulties? Are you interested in enhancing children’s learning ability?

boy

If you answered yes to any of the questions above, then this month’s series on DYSLEXIA is for you. The theme is Understanding Dyslexia. The aim of this series is to uncover what dyslexia really is in the face of prevailing myths. We will be sharing with you the signs, factors responsible, possible intervention plans and strategies, and other interesting information.

Long ago, dyslexia was termed as word blindness. It was also associated with visual impairment. More than it was an educational problem or psychological one, Dyslexia was considered a medical problem that stemmed from damages to brain areas that control language. This introductory article will highlight what dyslexia means and some common myths about dyslexia. You will find out that a child who expresses difficulty reading, or has challenges with sounds or letters of the alphabet is not stupid, lazy or lacking motivation.

What is Dyslexia?

Dyslexia as a word can be broken into two parts- Dys and lexia. Dys means “the absence of” while lexia means language. Thus, Dyslexia is commonly regarded as a difficulty with language which may include: reading, spelling, writing and sometimes speaking.

9 Myths about Dyslexiaalphabet

1. Dyslexia is a visual problem: Reversing letters as b’s instead of d’s is one of the signs of dyslexia but not a sufficient cause or sign for a dyslexia diagnosis. Most children while learning how to write, may reverse letters and eventually grow out of it.

2. Dyslexia affects only boys: Dyslexia is prevalent in both boys and girls. The reason boys get the most referrals is because of their behaviour. In expressing frustration regarding a reading difficulty, the teacher notices and makes referrals.

3. Poor performance equals dyslexia: Dyslexia as a learning difficulty does not imply intellectual disability. In fact most students with dyslexia may have an average or above average intelligence.

4. Dyslexics cannot read:  Children with dyslexia may find it difficult to read, but they can learn to read in which case, it takes them greater effort and more time to read.

5. Dyslexia can be outgrown: Dyslexia as we will see later is a difficulty that stems from impairments in brain functioning. As such, children with dyslexia grow on to become adults who read less automatically like those without dyslexia.

6. Dyslexia is caused by a lack of phonics instruction: Teaching a child phonics will not alleviate dyslexia . While they are able to learn phonics,  they experience difficulties applying them.

7. Every child who struggles with reading is dyslexic: Dyslexia is the most common cause of difficulties with reading, but it is by no means the only cause. Dyslexia does not only cause difficulties in reading but also in spelling, speech, and memorization. If a child is dyslexic, there will be other warning signs.

8. People with dyslexia see things backwards: Children with dyslexia do not see things backwards because dyslexia is not a problem with the eyes. Dyslexia may cause people to reverse certain words because of their confusion when discerning between left and right and their difficulties with comprehension.

brain areas

9. Children with dyslexia are just lazy. They should try harder!: Research has shown that those with dyslexia use a different part of their brain when reading and working with language. Dyslexic people show an abnormal pattern of brain function when reading: they show  under-activity in some regions and over-activity in another which, according to researches, accounts for the difficulty they have in extracting meaning from the printed word.

 

 

stupid 2A number of research studies have  provided evidence that people with dyslexia are not poorly taught, lazy, or stupid, rather they  have an inborn brain abnormality that does not have anything to do with their intelligence. When teachers and parents are not aware of these facts, the child is often labelled or branded as being ‘lazy or stupid.’ If children with dyslexia are not diagnosed early enough or do not receive the right type of intervention or classroom accommodations, they often struggle in school.

With the above myths and corresponding truths to debunk them, it is clear that many people including professionals have the wrong idea regarding the cause, symptoms, diagnoses and interventions for  Dyslexia.

 Always remember that every child learns uniquely, Dyslexia isn’t stupidity or laziness!

Welcome to the Dyslexia Awareness month!  Follow @drmorayojimoh for interesting updates.

 

 


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Understanding Learning Disorders

Certain disorders  make acquisition of  some academic skills difficult for children.

Kayode felt like he was always hitting the books. While his friends were meeting for pickup soccer games after school, he was back home in his room reading and re-reading the same book. Regardless of  how hard he  studied, he had difficulty remembering and his grades stayed average. Meanwhile, his friend Deji, who never seemed to study, always aced tests. It didn’t seem fair.

kayode

As a result of Kayode ‘s frustration, his dad and class teacher made an appointment with the school’s Educational psychologist who later diagnosed him with a learning disorder. Although, Kayode felt relieved to know what was going on, he was also worried. He didn’t like the “disorder” label. And he was concerned about what it might mean for his future.

Would he be able to go to college and study engineering as he’d hoped?

What are Learning Disorders?

Learning disabilities, difficulties or disorders are an umbrella term for a wide variety of learning problems. A learning disorder is not a problem with intelligence or motivation. Children with learning disorders aren’t lazy or dumb. In fact, most are just as smart as everyone else.  A learning disorder can cause a person to have trouble learning and using certain skills. The skills most often affected are:images (3)

  • reading,
  • writing,
  • listening,
  • speaking,
  • reasoning, and
  • Doing math.

Possible causes of Learning Disorders

According to Sheldon Horowitz, Ed.D, experts aren’t exactly sure what causes learning disorders. However, learning disorders may stem from subtle disturbances in brain structure and function that may begin before or even after birth which includes:

  • Heredity/Genetic predisposition: Often, learning disabilities run in the family, so it’s not uncommon to find that people with learning disabilities have parents or other relatives with similar difficulties.
  • Problems during pregnancy and birth: Learning disabilities may be caused by illness or injury during or before birth. It may also be caused by low birth weight, lack of oxygen, drug and alcohol use during pregnancy, and premature or prolonged labor.
  • Incidents after birth:Severe head injuries or trauma, nutritional deprivation, central nervous system infections and exposure to toxic substances (i.e. lead) can contribute to learning disabilities.

Signs and Symptoms of Learning Disorders.

Learning disorders are usually very different from one child to another. One child may struggle with reading and spelling, while another loves literacy but can’t understand numeracy. Another child may experience difficulties comprehending information.

It’s not always easy to identify learning disorders. However, some warning signs are more common than others at different ages.

The following checklist lists some common red flags:

Preschool  (3-6)

  • Trouble finding the right word
  • Problems pronouncing words
  • Difficulty rhyming
  • Trouble learning the alphabet, numbers, colors, shapes, days of the week
  • Difficulty following directions or learning routines
  • Difficulty controlling crayons, pencils, and scissors or coloring within the lines

Ages 5 – 9

  • Trouble learning the connection between letters and sounds
  • Unable to blend sounds to make words
  • Confuses basic words when reading
  • Consistently misspells words and makes frequent reading errors
  • Trouble learning basic math concepts
  • Difficulty telling time and remembering sequences

Ages 10-13

  • Difficulty with reading comprehension or math skills
  • Trouble with open-ended test questions and word problems
  • Dislikes reading and writing; avoids reading aloud
  • Spells the same word differently in a write-up
  • Poor organizational skills (bedroom, homework, desk is messy and disorganized)
  • Trouble following classroom discussions and expressing thoughts aloud
  • Poor handwriting

Intervention for Learning Disorders

A child with a learning disorder should receive his or her own Individualized Education Program, (IEP) after a thorough assessment has been carried out by an Educational psychologist. This personalized and written education plan lists individualized goals for the child, specifies what services and tutoring the child will receive and the specialists who will work with the child.

Visit us at http://www.mobilehealthconsult.org/values/psycho-educational-assessment/ for more information regarding a Psycho-educational assessment.

“How can someone with learning disorders improve their ability to learn, rather than just compensate for difficulties?”

Many of the methods used and promoted to help people with learning disorders are intended to help a person compensate for, or work around, their learning difficulties.

 

  • Cognitive Enhancement Software: BrainWare Safari is an award winning software program that incorporates decades of proven clinical approaches to cognitive skills development into an engaging video game format. It is used to improve IQ, academic performance and overall cognitive abilities. It develops and strengthens cognitive skills crucial for learning. i.e. Attention, memory, visual and auditory processing skills, sensory integration and thinking. Visit http://www.mobilehealthconsult.org/values/cognitive-enhancement-training/brainware-safari for further information on “Brainware Safari”.

 


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Understanding Autism

Have you ever wondered what exactly autism is? Do you know someone who you think might be autistic? Would you like to understand and relate better with him or her? Are there any available treatments for autism?

Most people have heard of Autistic disorder, more commonly known as Autism, and may have a vague idea of some behaviours to expect from an autistic person. A typical example would be Dustin Hoffman’s award winning portrayal in the 1988 hit movie “Rain Man”. What this article aims to do is not just to give more information about autism, but to elicit a deeper understanding of the disorder so that one can relate better with such people.

According to Diagnostic and Statistical Manual IV (DSM-IV), autism should be diagnosed when a person has at least six or more symptoms from the 3 major symptom areas which are Social interactions, Communication and Repetitive and rigid behaviours. It is also noted that these Symptoms should be apparent before 3 years of age. Autism is found 4 times more often in boys than girls. Now to explore these areas and how one can cope with people expressing these symptoms. 

Autistic people have problems with social interactions so you’d find that they don’t express themselves the way A child alone in a school playgroundnormal people do in their speech and gestures and they don’t keep eye contact. They prefer to keep to themselves and seem to lack empathy. This makes it difficult for them to make friends and in fact it doesn’t often seem like they are interested in doing so. Having an autistic child in a normal school setting my not be the best option as they do not enjoy crowds and that much attention either. As they do form attachments to caregivers, it would be preferable for their caregivers to teach them and spend time with them in their homes, a place where they are used to already. Caregivers also have to understand what behaviours to expect and realize it is not their fault that the child seems indifferent or does not want to play with them. It could be frustrating but autistic people need patience, along with the presence and attention of the caregiver.

They also have language problems. Either their sentences are incomplete or they keep repeating the same word over and over. They rarely gesture when they speak so particular attention would have to be paid when they are trying to communicate. Again this requires a lot of patience and understanding. One can try to probe them when they think they have an idea of what the autistic person is trying to say. However they should not be hurried or forced to speak faster or clearer because it would not help the situation.

94387630Finally, they’d have one or more repetitive behaviour patterns. A common one is having specific items that they stick to, like seating on the same chair and the same spot, using the same cup each day and playing with the same toys. They also stick to a strict routine each day, doing the same activities in the same pattern, and have compulsions, such as arranging items in a particular order. It may seem weird but one should not interfere as it may make them very anxious. They have limited interests due to their strict daily pattern so finding what would keep them happy would not be difficult. However, it may be difficult to watch them do repetitive body movements such as turning their heads or flapping their hands again and again. This does not mean there’s a problem as they reward themselves internally for such behaviour. One should just observe to make sure they do not harm themselves in the process.

It is important to treat autistic people not like they have a disorder or like they are weird, as they still have feelings, but as a different type of people. However, there is a possibility of improving their condition and making them closer to normal.

 

Neurofeedback and Autism

kent_eeg_4

Neurofeedback is one of the treatments that could help improve an autistic persons condition. It is the monitoring and normalizing of the persons brainwave activities through an electroencephalographic (EEG) brain scan. Of the few and limited treatments for autism, in a small number of studies, improvements in speech and social interaction have been found after people with autism used neurofeedback compared to those who didn’t. So it is definitely a treatment one can give a chance in order to improve an autistic persons quality of life. (For more information on neurofeedback visit http://www.mobilehealthconsult.org/?page_id=724 )

April is Autism awareness month, spread the knowledge about autism!